Four Days

Has the suspense of my absence been killing you? I’m sure it has. i’m sure you’ve been able to think of nothing else.

Let me bring you up to speed…

Shortly after my last post Dr. R released me from the hospital. I was allowed to go home on modified bed rest. I didn’t have to literally stay in bed, but I wasn’t allowed to do much more than make myself a sandwhich for lunch, rotate between the recliner and the couch, and attend my biweekly doctor appointment. I couldn’t complain though, because I was so glad to be home. So glad, in fact, that I didn’t want to do anything that reminded me of my stay in the hospital–including updating my blog.

I was allowed to spend Thanksgiving Day out with my family. While I loved having a reason to wear pants without a drawstring, I realized that day how much bed rest had set me back. I was completely overwhelmed by all the people, food, and conversation. Despite feeling absolutely ragged at the end of the day, I was so thankful to be able to see my family and get some fresh air.

The Monday after Thanksgiving, after reviewing my improving lab work, Dr. B released me to go back to work. I was really looking forward to having a routine again. AND the more time I work before the baby arrives, the more time I’ll be saving for my maternity leave.

I’ve been back at work for three weeks–just long enough to take on a few projects and tie up some lose ends from before my stint in the hospital.

Tomorrow is my last day of work. I’m anticipating that this weekend will be partially filled with things we won’t get to do for a while after Beckett arrives (like eat at fancy restaurants and take naps) and will partially be filled with preparation for his arrival (like laundry and vacuuming).

We are scheduled to go to the hospital on Monday for my induction. The plan is to have some medicine over night that will prepare my body for labor, then work on having this baby bright and early on Tuesday.

At my exam last week, Dr. R told me that my body is already in a really great place for indcution–2 centimeters dialated and 50 percent effaced. This is GREAT news, consider this is my first full-term pregnancy and we are inducing early. If my body wasn’t already starting to prepare, the chance of C-Section would be pretty high.

I have my last exam before delivery this afternoon. Part of me is hoping that she will just tell me to go straight to the hospital. The other part of me really wants to eat at Osaka one last time.

Either way, meeting Beckett is right around the corner–four days at the very most.

As John can attest, I have been very emotional this week, not sure how to prepare for such a monumental life change. As we were in the hospital, we are praying that whatever happens, we will come through it with a happy, healthy baby.

Prayers of thanksgiving that we’ve made it this far and prayers of protection for a safe and easy delivery!

Week 35. Can't wait to meet him.

Week 35. Can’t wait to meet him.

32 Weeks: Home

I think everyone thought that by 32 weeks we would have met Beckett and set up camp in the NICU. Praise God that’s not the case.

Last night I was released to come home on bed rest. I honestly didn’t think I would be leaving that hospital without having a baby.

While I am home, I’ll be going to the doctor’s office for monitoring and lab work about twice a week. I’m also on medication to help lower my liver enzymes, and I am monitoring my own blood pressure during the day.

Obviously, I’m glad to be home, but I feel like the diagnosis of Cholestasis of Pregnancy comes with some added worries about the effects this condition could have on Beckett. Cholestasis is linked to increased risk of Sudden Fetal Demise. While Dr. R assured me that the chances of this happening are still very low, it’s a legitimate concern. I’m trying not to dwell on it, but I think it will be in the back of my mind until delivery.

With that in mind, Dr. R said she won’t let my pregnancy go further than 37, which is technically full term. So, our modified due date is on or around December 18—just five weeks away! Hopefully, we’ll have Beckett home for Christmas.

Looks like I’ll be spending the next five weeks online shopping for Beckett’s first Christmas!

31 Weeks

When I was admitted to the hospital two weeks ago, I don’t think anyone thought I would still be here and still be pregnant today. But I am, and although I’d like to be almost anywhere else, the fact that Beckett has been given this opportunity to grow means everything.

I’m not sure if it’s because I haven’t been very active during the last two weeks or because Beckett is growing like a weed, but I feel like my tummy is twice as big and twice as heavy as it was last week. I’ve never been so happy to be carrying extra weight!

Aside from my counting to each week marker, my days are really running together—sleep, labs, ultrasounds, doctors, nurses, naps, gluten-free bread. It’s all a blur, which is making documenting my time in here more difficult.

Also, as if the make the waiting a little more unbearable, it seems that the doctors and whatever is going on in my body are engaged in some kind of biological standoff. We’re all just waiting for something to happen—for me to get deathly ill or for my liver to say, “Just kidding guys. Carry on with your lives.” I’m sure this is my impatience talking, but at this point, either outcome would be fine with me as long as we have an answer at the end.

The doctors agree that there’s about a 50/50 chance of us actually figuring out what’s going on. I know I’m being seen by some of the best, most well-read, experienced OBs and specialists in the area. If they’re unsure they’ll ever know what’s happening here, I’m starting to wonder why I’m here at all.

I’ve been granted a little bit more leeway as far as being able to get up and walk around. The doctors aren’t holding my breakfast anymore. And I’ve been moved back to a normal antepartum room. I think they are testing my body to see if the bed rest has been staving off an immanent illness.

My blood pressure has been higher since I’ve been more active. That, coupled with the fact that they’re still not certain if this is a pregnancy-induced condition, makes them uncomfortable with me going home any time soon. I feel like I was pretty naïve to get my hopes up, but I’ve found it’s easier to be here when I think of this as something that will help keep Beckett safe and healthy.

Also, I have time to watch Wendy Williams now.

Because I’ll be here a while longer, I’ve taken some pictures of some of a few things make me smile.

Enjoy! And continued prayers please!

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St. Francis of Assisi

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Yummy gluten-free meal John made. Grilled chicken, roasted red potatoes, and gluten-free mac and cheese.

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Beautiful green leaves on my walk outside.

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Beard hat I made for B.

30 Weeks!

It’s official. Even though the nurses and doctors have been calling Becket a 30-week-old, today is the actual 30-week marker! While the medical staff has told me to breathe a sigh of relief, my eyes are already set on our next big milestone: 32 weeks. I found a really great article that outlines the week-by-week developments in premature babies: click here.

I have a sneaking suspicion we may not make it much further though. As I type, I am sitting in a room in the Labor and Delivery ward, hooked up to a fetal heart rate monitor, a contraction monitor, and a blood pressure cuff. Don’t worry just yet! I am not actively laboring or delivering. Dr. R decided to move me to this end of the floor for closer monitoring after a bit of a scare yesterday.

Yesterday morning, I woke up with what seemed like a hangover headache. I thought my head hurt because I had slept very heavily (re: at all) for the first time during my hospital stay. But the longer I was awake, the worst the headache became. It peaked in the afternoon–I had to take some pain medication and lay with an ice pack on my eyes.

If I had been at home with this headache, I would have taken some Tylenol, gone to bed, and not thought anything of it. However, headaches can be a symptom of preeclampsia, an indication of possible brain swelling, so I’m glad Dr. R is taking it so seriously.

Still no definitive news. Still waiting on lab results. Still enduring sticks and pokes and jabs and squeezes, and that’s not counting the feisty Baby B, who has been super active the past couple days.

I’m beginning to read like a broken record, but I really can’t thank everyone enough for the wonderful words of encouragement and the constant prayers. We know prayer works and we know God is keeping us safe. We pray that whatever happens in the coming days and weeks only helps us the grow in Him and bring us closer together as a happy, healthy family.